Friday, January 23, 2015

Say It Isn't So - Sky Mall!!!

I just read that the uiquitous "Sky Mall" Magazine might be going out of business. (
In tribute, I had to post this song I wrote on a plane a few years ago......

Sky Mall- January 14, 2008
Words and Music ©  2008 – Rabbi Joe Black - All rights reserved
I was sitting on a plane just the other day
With a broken IPod and no tunes to play
I was bored and desperate to find a way
To keep from climbing the wall
I saw a magazine that was stuck in the seat
I pulled it out and I started to read
I suddenly knew my life was incomplete
When I opened up the Sky Mall                                                      

Sky Mall, Sky Mall – who says you can’t have it all?
So much stuff it’ll make your skin crawl
In the pages of the sky mall

I saw a big fake rock where I could hide a key
A genuine ice cream factory
If I bought a Ginsu®  knife I’d get three for free
I couldn’t resist the call
So I whipped out my Trusty American Express
I was out of control, I must confess
I engaged in an orgy of self-excess
In the pages of the sky mall

I bought a trouser press that made a perfect pleat
A pair of space age slippers that would warm my feet
A life time supply of doggy treats
And a genuine pashamina shawl
An inflatable bed for a weekend guest
A bluetooth wrist watch GPS
A pair of his and her latex sweater vests
From the pages of the Sky Mall

In a few days the packages started to arrive
FEDEX trucks swarmed like bees in a hive
I felt like I was truly alive
As I gazed out on my haul
I was buying stuff from dusk till dawn
But soon I began to lose my calm
My wallet was empty – I was overdrawn
I was hooked on the Sky Mall

This was no simple case of buyer’s remorse
If I didn’t find a way to change my course
Things would only get worse and worse
I was blind and couldn’t see
I needed someone with lot’s of clout
So I gave my congressman a shout
He said:´No problem, son I can help you out”
“Just become a 501c3.”

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